Perhaps you’ve already seen this.
What tips can you give to an evil tyrant in training?
Anonymous1. Be merciless. Always. Show the slightest bit of softness, the slightest inkling that there’s a blotch of white on your black soul, and it will be your undoing.
2. Never let those around you, friends, foes, and underling vermin, forget for a second what you are capable of. You are their god, and they should always have that in mind. Demonstrate this as much as needed, and more.
3. Have fun. Don’t go slunk off to your chambers and brood about how horrible you are. That just leads to depression, which leads to guilt, which leads to a conscience, which leads to the end of your tyranny. Enjoy every single second of your damnable deeds.
That should give you a good start.
My Lord, Would it be totally inappropriate or Offensive to confess that I find you extremely attractive?
AnonymousWell, I am certainly a creature of pure beauty, so it is only natural for such a low creature like yourself would have that reaction.
But don’t think I’d ever dirty myself by laying with you. My genes are far too precious too waste on common vermin.
Lord Frieza, I am honored that you have graced my blog with your presence, but I feel I must ask why? I hope you dont mind the question, but even I admit that my blog isnt really the most impressive one out there.
You clearly know your machines, and i need that kind of information. I look forward to your next report.
(Okay, to be honest, I kind of have a “you watch me, I watch you” policy for this place. Mutual advertising, as it were.)
Riiiiiight. And what adorable antics "aren't" you affected by? It's Fluttershy, right?
AnonymousN-no! It’s not that bookish librarian, it’s not those three cutie-whatever hunters, it’s not the pink pastry chef, and it’s most certainly NOT Fluttershy, especially when she squeaks!
Lord Frieza, you sure are following a lot of ponies on tumblr. Is there something you'd like to tell us?
AnonymousW-what? What are you implying? That I’ve gone soft? That I have a weakness for those technicolor, bright-eyed little pack mules? O-of course not! I’m just, erm, watching them so I can plan my next move! Gathering intelligence, as it were.
I am most certainly not affected by their adorable little antics. not one bit.
Yeah, well, until you become immortal, you won't be able to survive entering one.
AnonymousYou really have no idea what kind of power you’re toying with here, do you?
It doesn't matter how big your empire gets, you'll never reach my world. I will say this, it resides in the very center of a black hole.
AnonymousWell, that does rule out quite a bit! Thanks for the hint, it’ll make finding you that much easier.
Knowing you, you'd probably blow it up. So if you're going to take your anger out on anyone use me, but keep my people out of this.
AnonymousFine, but I’ll remember this. And when my empire stretches out to engulf your world, I’ll hunt you down myself and make you watch as everything and everyone you’ve ever loved burns in the fires you could have put out had you just answered one. Simple. Question.
I’ll be seeing you again very soon.
